What Mama Never Told Me

It was a mostly normal Tuesday afternoon, except Jayla and I had doctor appointments. Jayla had a follow-up appointment with her dermatologist. She was released to live the life of a normal toddler who no longer has a deadly bacterial infection. I had my first EVER appointment with a primary care physician. It turns out that I am allergic to Houston and was released to a life of Flonase, Claritin, and yogurt.

I am told this is normal. I have apparently never been normal.

As the doctor examined me on Tuesday afternoon, she asked me if anyone in my family had a history of allergies – Hay Fever? Asthma? The lightbulb went off in my head when she mentioned asthma. “Yup. Mama.” I answered. She replied, “Well, you can thank your mama because you are suffering from allergies”.

What? What does a sort throat have to do with allergies? And why is it that I’ve never been allergic to anything ever before in my life?

She explained the postnasal drip that has apparently been causing blisters on the back of my throat which is why the immense pain has been torturing me for the past week. She also said that allergens are particularly bad this year and people that usually are not affected, have been.

I asked her what sorts of things I could be allergic to.

I just remember “smog” being in that list. She might as well have said, “Houston.”

When I got in the car, I did just as the doctor suggested – I called my mama to thank her for my allergies. She laughed. I kept talking. I told her how I swore to the doctor that I had never had any issues with being allergic to anything in my life.

Mama’s response: “Well, not exactly. When you were little you were allergic to everything. I remember your daddy almost killed you one time. You were following him around the house and he was using bleach to do a load of laundry. He didn’t know what had happened. All of a sudden you couldn’t breathe. We had to take you to the hospital for a reaction to bleach.”

What!?!? No, mama, there’s no reason that you should have told me that I was allergic to bleach at some point in my life. There’s no reason that you should have told me that I was hospitalized on several occasions due to allergic reactions. And there’s certainly no need to know that I was an asthmatic child.

But, I do appreciate knowing that all of that cleared up when we moved to North Carolina. I may need to use that as a supporting argument one day. I can see it now – “But, at least I’m not allergic to North Carolina!”