Like Looking in a Mirror

Today was Jayla's end of the school year party at school. It seemed especially fitting since tomorrow is her last day in the toddler room that she has called home for the past 16 months. As usual, I was responsible for bringing one of the entree items for the party. I kind of like bringing hot food for the party because I know I am one of the few parents in the classroom that can do that for our kids. Obviously, most parents who send their toddler to school full-time do so because they work full-time jobs. I am the exception. But, I digress...

This morning, I cut up a couple of frozen pizzas into toddler-sized bites and took it over to the school about 15 minutes before the party was scheduled to start. As I approached the door to Jayla's classroom, I heard one of the teachers yelling her name and then I heard Jayla screaming at the top of her lungs. She was so upset that she didn't even acknowledge my presence. I walked in, she looked directly at me and continued to scream. She was still screaming when I walked out and came back home.

So, why was she screaming and crying while the other 15 kids who are all younger than her peacefully worked on whatever activity they had been assigned to work on at the time? Because Jayla is her mama's child. Jayla gets very frustrated whenever she doesn't do something perfectly on the first try. She was working on a puzzle and had gotten frustrated because one of the pieces did not fit the way she thought it should. And when I say "she gets frustrated", it's really more accurate to say that she gets blazing mad. As I was finding a place to put the pizza down, I heard one of the teachers telling her, "Jayla you got it right. Look, it fits just like this." The next thing I know Jayla was throwing the puzzle pieces across the room. That's when I left.

Jayla has similar episodes at home. But, I try to remain calm (like the teacher did) and I try to encourage her to keep trying. She usually doesn't want to and I don't blame her. I am the exact same way. I basically won't even try anything that I don't think I will excel at it. It's nothing that I'm proud of but, it's something that I seem to have passed on to my child. I don't want her to be like me in that respect. I want her to be able to try new things and work at them even if she isn't perfect the first time. Something tells me that working towards that with her is going to require me to learn a thing or two as well.